About my Squint Surgery

Before Surgery

I was born with a squint, but it was never a weakness for me. Yes, I know it may make me seem less conventionally beautiful but I have always accepted myself as I am. We all know that Allah created us and no creation of Allah is ever ugly. So, my squint is also a part of my beauty.


After reading this, you might think I’m a strong mentally person, but the truth is, I’m not always as strong as I seem. This year, on March 12th, I had surgery to correct my squint. Your first question might be: "Why did I do it?"

The reason is, there was someone in my life who believed I didn’t look beautiful. Wanting to be beautiful in his eyes, I chose to undergo the surgery.


When I went for the surgery, I was filled with fear and anxiety. I remained fully conscious and kept talking to the doctor the entire time. Fortunately, the doctor was incredibly kind and reassuring he eased my nerves and helped me feel comfortable throughout the procedure. It lasted almost an hour, and after that, I returned home.
                                           


Although the surgery itself was minor, the pain afterward was anything . It felt as though someone was constantly pressing on my eye. I couldn’t open it properly and whether I tried to open or close my eyes, the pain was intense. It took nearly three months for the pain to fully disappear but after that long recovery, I finally had the beautiful eye I had hoped for.


Now I want to share what happened after the surgery. For The person I did it ,he said, "Yes, now you have nice eyes, but your skin tone is too dark." In that moment, I realized something important, no matter what I change about myself, I may never be considered "beautiful" in his eyes.

After surgery

I now understand that I shouldn’t have to change myself or endure pain just to please someone else. What I really need is to love myself and wait for the person who will accept me as I am someone who won’t want to change me, who will love me for my dark skin and all the so-called imperfections I have. 

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my blog. Sending you all my love and gratitude.

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